My Lord Won’t You Buy me a new Schlager Sword? by Sevrin de Savage (Tune: “Lord Won’t You Buy Me a Mercedes Benz?) My Lord, won’t you buy me a new Schlager sword My friends all sport DelTins, but that I can’t afford Fiberglass is my mistress, but some say I’m wrong My rapier is duct taped and fourteen feet long My Lord, won’t you buy me a new Schlager sword Switching to steel may end this discord My style depends on my old fishing pole Now they say if I don’t cut it I can’t fight at all My Lord, won’t you buy me a new Schlager sword I’ll change my ways, I swear to this, my Lord With plastic rapier I’m as deadly as they say I can tip-cut an opponent two ericks away So M’Lord won’t you buy me a new Schlager sword My friends all sport DelTins, but that I can’t afford Fibreglass is my mistress, but some say I’m wrong My rapier is duct taped and fourteen feet long